Navigating Violence and Prejudice: A Mother's Perspective

On the afternoon of July 29th, I was on the phone with a friend, planning a trip to Southport beach with our children for later that week. Just after the call, I came across the news of a knife crime that had occurred in Southport. The next day, I texted my friend to let her know it was not a good idea to go there due to the recent incident. Little did I know that this incident was going to open up a lot of wounds.

As we all may know, the aftermath of the incident was unsettling. The Sunday after, while watching the news, I couldn't help but wonder what might have caused such strong feelings of violence. It was heart-breaking to hear about the loss of three beautiful girls—may their souls rest in peace. However, the level of violence around the UK towards immigrants and even the police was very disturbing. This was particularly concerning for me, considering my family is not originally from the UK.

The only thing I could think of was the deep unhappiness and pain within people, which seemed to have found a violent outlet. While this was going on, all I could think about were the children who were observing the situation and those getting involved in the violence. It is heart-breaking to think about our children growing up in such a heated and violent environment.

At home, I tried to shield my children from the news. However, a week after the incident, I decided it was time to sit my children, aged 9 and 7 (the 3-year-old being too young to understand), down to discuss what was going on. This is what I want to blog about.

As parents, it is our responsibility to explain things in a child-friendly way, ensuring our children understand the situations happening around them. Otherwise, they might come across these events on the internet or hear about them from friends in a way that might not help them process it well. When I asked my children about the knife incident, they knew about it but were unaware of the aftermath. Naturally, they asked why people were being violent.

It is important to explain to your child that not all people are bad, no particular race is better than the other, and that there are people of different religions in the world, some of whom do not have any religion at all—and that is okay. It is crucial for us as parents, caregivers, or adults around children to teach them how to empathize, how to express their emotions even when they are unhappy or hurt, and that violence is never the answer.

There have been various incidents of different races and people attacking one another. For example, on 30th April, 2024, a white person chased and attacked a black boy in London. Additionally, five years ago, there was a bombing in Manchester. With the recent incident in Southport, we must ask: Is it really a matter of race against race, or is it about what is going on in people's minds? How are people feeling in their own spaces?

My husband and I felt it was important to discuss these issues with our children so they would not be caught by surprise or remain ignorant, thinking we were protecting them by not telling them what was happening.

Suggested Discussion Points for Parents

Here are some of the things you might want to discuss and teach your child when having conversations about race, emotions, and mental health:

• Empathy: Teach your child to understand and share the feelings of others. Explain the importance of putting themselves in someone else’s shoes.

• Expressing Emotions: Encourage your child to express their feelings in healthy ways, whether they are happy, sad, or angry. Let them know it is okay to feel these emotions, but they must find constructive ways to express them.

• Kindness and Respect: Emphasize the importance of being kind and respectful to everyone, regardless of their race, religion, or background.

• Understanding Diversity: Help your child understand that the world is made up of diverse people with different beliefs, cultures, and traditions, and that this diversity is something to be celebrated.

• Standing Against Injustice: Teach your child to stand up against injustice and to speak out when they see something wrong, but to do so in a peaceful and constructive manner.

As parents and caregivers, it’s crucial to have open and honest conversations with our children about the world around them. If you found this post helpful, please share it with other parents and caregivers who might benefit from these insights.

Let’s work together to raise compassionate, understanding, and respectful children who will contribute to a more peaceful and inclusive society.